Motherhood

Bismillaah,

The Quran and Sunnah clearly highlight the status of the mother in Islam. It is very important for a Muslim to contemplate about why the Deen has given her such a high status. The following narration can give us a hint to this:

Sa'id ibn Abi Burda said, "I heard my father say that Ibn 'Umar saw a Yamani man going around the House while carrying his mother on his back, saying, 'I am your humble camel. If her mount is frightened, I am not frightened.' Then he asked, 'Ibn 'Umar? Do you think that I have repaid her?' He replied, 'No, not even for a single groan she made in pain."

The status of the mother is very high in Islaam for it is her who endures so much pain just to bring a new life into this world (by the permission of Allah alone of course). It is the mother who carries the responsibility of taking care of this new soul and nurturing it with love and care.  It is the mother who is to be the main teacher and guide for this soul and if she is corrupt then most likely her child will also grow up corrupt and if she is righteous and strong her child will grow up righteous. Why? Because the mother as the poet said, is a madrasa (school) and if you prepare her very well then you prepare a nation with good foundations.

Just look throughout history. All of the greatest men were raised mainly by women or households run mainly by a mother figure. Musa (as) grew up in the house of Firawn but it was none other than Aasiyyah who raised him to be the great man he was. Eesa (as) was raised by Maryam (as), the greatest woman to walk this earth. Muhammad (sala allahu alayhi wa sallam) was raised by Umm Ayman (Baraka Al Habashiyyah)  for a good number of years after his mother's death. And he (sala allahu alayhi wa sallam) did also live under the care of the bedouin woman Haleema as - Sa'diyyah who nursed him and took care of him the first 6 years of life. The great taabi'ee Rabia ar-Ra'y, who was the teacher and shaykh of Imam Malik ibn Anas and who taught in the masjid of the prophet, was raised by his mother for nearly 30 years after her husband went off for jihad in the sake of Allah.  Imam al Shafi'ee was raised by his mother after his father's death and it was she who sent him to learn under the ulema from a very young age.  And there are countless other examples. 

Therefore, the status of the mother should never be undermined by anyone. The mother is truly the backbone of the household while the father is its main head and Ameer. Their example is like that if the captain of a ship and his crew. The husband is the captain while the mother is the example of the crew. The captain cannot drive the ship without his crew, he cannot make the journey alone. A father cannot raise children alone but he needs a  mother for these children to grow righteous and strong. It is interesting to note that a man cannot really raise a child alone while a mother on the other hand can. This is because the child is with the mother from the very first second of his life. The child relies on the mother for survival. She breastfeeds the child and her milk is not just sustenance for him but immunity from diseases and other sicknesses as well. The mother stays up many nights with her child, feeding and taking care of him. Yes you may have dark circles under your eyes from lack of sleep.  Yes you may complain of constant back pain from your birth labor and from cleaning a lot. Yes you may be puked on and may constantly have to change your clothes. Yes you may have to wake up in the middle of the night and in the early mornings to change stinky diapers but who cares.  All of that is for the one you love and this new experience of motherhood should only increase you in shukr to Allah for having blessed you with this beautiful blessing in your arms. 

Motherhood comes with great rewards if the mother has ikhlaas (sincerity) in her actions and if she is patient and strong.  The scrumptious bundle of joy you have in your hands brightens your day as soon as you see his beautiful smile and dimples on his cheeks. The beautiful shiny eyes and chubby cheeks  seem to cast a spell on you as it makes you forget the lack of sleep or backache or house chores you were complaining about a few seconds earlier. So I ask Allah to reward all of our mothers for what they went through to bring us to this world and what they endured in raising us to the best of their abilities and may Allah make us righteous mothers who will raise the next generation of ulema and warriors. May Allah use us for His Deen and protect us and our families from all fitan (trials and tribulations). Aameen yaa Rabb al aalameen!